I'm having trouble caring about blogging. Or, rather, I'm having trouble caring about the stuff I ought to cover in this blog. Maybe it's writer's block, but maybe it's something more than that.
When Star Spangled Haggis began in 2004, it was something I threw up (with the help of a very tech-savvy friend) because some family and friends liked my kooky stories about work and life and politics. So it was a way to tell the stories and keep in touch with people I already knew.
In 2005 it served as a wonderful way to communicate with friends and family while we were in China being joined with Bambina.
It has more recently served as a way to communicate all the funny and stupid and unpleasant elements of a stem cell transplant.
Somewhere between the transplant and now, I've lost the urge to talk politics 24/7. Maybe because I don't have the time I had while a shut-in to read/surf the web/study/ and understand all the issues, any post on a given topic feels like it would be nonsense prattling.
I've also found myself straying into Dear Diary territory and that breaches the Prime Directive of this blog from its founding: no diary writing. I'm also veering into Mommy Chronicles territory, which is entertaining now and again, but not really something that makes me sit up till 2am getting on a blog.
So, as U2 said after the monster success of The Joshua Tree and Rattle and Hum, "this is the end of something...we have to go away and...dream it all up again." What they dreamed up was Achtung Baby, an album unlike any they had created before. One particular song on AB, called Acrobat, really spoke to my 1992 self. A couple of lines are speaking to me now:
What are we going to do now it's all been said?
No new ideas in the house, and every book's been read.
So I'm thinking that might be what I need to do here. Maybe go away and dream it all up again. Find a new voice, a new way of saying new things. Maybe let the Haggis go with dignity before I manage to kill it with mediocrity.