Tuesday, November 11, 2008

No Segue; But Short Story is I'm Pissed. Profanity Warning!

First, a great post by Fester about the Republican Party's seeming obsession against gays, and how it affects their ability to speak to people in our and future generations. His key point? "Sanctity of marriage to my ears means that people I went to school with, people who I have grown up with, people who I have worked with, and people who I am friends with will have a massive target on their faces and on their backs for being who they are. I won't vote for a party that actively looks to fuck over my friends or people who are similar to my friends." Amen to that.


And speaking of fucking over, I am LIVID at my kid's preschool. They did a special vacation day program today, so the regular teachers were not there, and the kids were combined into different classrooms. No big deal. So I drop her off in a new room and go on my way. I arrive ten minutes before she's due to get out to find her classroom dark and empty (she's a half-day student while most are full-day). I start searching the other classrooms; also dark and empty. I go back to her room and see that her belongings are not there but the other kids' things are. This tells me that wherever she is, she's not returning to this room. It's now 5 minutes till the end, so I know no one is coming back. So I search the playground; not there. I then go to the office and ask, "Where are the kids? Where is my child?" Nonchalantly: "Oh, she's right here." Long boring story short and sort of boring: the teachers took the full-day kids to a show that was at the facility and just dropped my kid off at the office on the way to the auditorium WITHOUT TELLING ME. I was like, "How is it that I, the parent, am searching the school to find my child? How is it that I hand her over to two licensed teachers--thereby establishing chain of custody for my daughter--and she is not subsequently handed back to me by those teachers in the place where I left her? How does that happen where my child is "dropped off" at an office--albeit full of really lovely ladies--but not one of them a teacher, not one of them full-time watching my child (which I do pay for), and not one person in the entire organization sees fit to tell me ahead of time?"

I'm not conflict-avoidant by any means but neither do I get off on it. But today I was so rattled by the fact that someone could just transport my kid somewhere--even within a school--and not tell me, I just couldn't make nice even with ladies I have to get along with for PTA reasons: "I just have to say right now that I am extremely irritated. I'll have to contact you later because I don't want to say too much at the moment, but I just want you to know that I am incandescent at how this has transpired." Then I went home, calmed down, wondered how I came up with "incandescent" in the moment, and fired off an email to the director detailing my "grave concern" at the lapse in the chain of custody--and at the very least the lapse in communicating to me that my child would not be in the place and with the people with whom I entrusted her. I mean, WHAT THE FUCK??!!! I'm searching the school for my 4 year old? I don't fucking think so!!

It rattled me because, even though I knew in my head and heart that my kid was no doubt just fine, the mere inkling that I could not locate my daughter just absolutely shook me to my core. Like, I left her here, with her stuff, with YOU. And you just left her in an office with secretaries? All nice ladies, but NOT licensed teachers, NOT insured for child care, not trained in child care, and NOT the fucking people I entrusted my kid to! Which is what it comes down to: trust. I said in the email that I want to be able to trust that when I leave my daughter in their care in X location that, unless I'm told otherwise in advance, she will be handed back to me in X location by people licensed to do so. I still love the school and love the program and so does Bambina. But damn if I'm not going to make their lives a little bit hellish for the next couple of days so they get just a small soupcon of what it feels like to briefly have NO IDEA where your kid has been taken. You fuck with my kid, you are absolutely fucking with me. And you don't want to experience the kind of bad day I can bring you in that regard.

So. Deep breath. Letting it out... Okay. On a happier note, the show she was supposed to see with the other kids was SteveSongs. He was walking into the building today for the show and--damn is he cute. A total Hebrew Hottie. I made the mistake of saying to Bambina as we walked by him unloading his gear and waved hello, "Mama thinks SteveSongs is very handsome." She said in her usual roar, "What you mean "handsome"? Why is SteveSongs handsome?" Sheepish wave to Steve--oh yeah--and his wife in the car. Way to go, Mama.


Anonymous said...

The horror that you feel when you can't find your child is indescribable...sorry you had to go through that.

On a happier note, we LOVE SteveSongs...he is performing in Sudbury on Saturday, we'll be there! My kids listen to "Marvelous Day" every night-for the past 2 years. he's also on PBS as Mr. Steve.

Anonymous said...

Same sex marriage: Why has this become such the deal? Do we now think we have more wisdom than over 3000 years of Judaism, 2000 years of Christianity, however many years of Islam, Buddism etc? I think gays in long-term relationships should have civil rights (and California has some of the best domestic partnership laws in the land), I am not anti-gay, but marriage has always been man/woman...why f with that? Why does "marriage" have to be re-defined? Why not polygamy? Consenting adults and all...

Figured you could shed some light on this for me...

EE said...
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