Truly one of the funniest and snarkiest sites out there today. He deconstructs New York Times wedding announcements to great effect. This one is long but so right on:
VeiledConceit
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
POTUS's SOTU
I missed the live State of the Union address tonight. Bah. I had been wondering all day whether/how long the POTUS would take to mention The Date That Must Be Mentioned in All Presidential Speeches.
So as I was perusing the transcript on the WashPost website, there it was, a mere three paragraphs into the speech: "On September the 11th, 2001, we found that problems originating in a failed and oppressive state 7,000 miles away could bring murder and destruction to our country."
You know, if he were Bill Clinton, the GOP would say he has no shame because--even five years later--he is still using a national tragedy for his political gain. Or more accurately, he uses it as a shield for everything he does. Don't like my policies? But they're to prevent another 9/11! Don't like my policies? People like you don't care if there is another 9/11! Don't like my policies? Don't you remember 9/11?
Dear god, can't we just get on with 2008 already?
So as I was perusing the transcript on the WashPost website, there it was, a mere three paragraphs into the speech: "On September the 11th, 2001, we found that problems originating in a failed and oppressive state 7,000 miles away could bring murder and destruction to our country."
You know, if he were Bill Clinton, the GOP would say he has no shame because--even five years later--he is still using a national tragedy for his political gain. Or more accurately, he uses it as a shield for everything he does. Don't like my policies? But they're to prevent another 9/11! Don't like my policies? People like you don't care if there is another 9/11! Don't like my policies? Don't you remember 9/11?
Dear god, can't we just get on with 2008 already?
Someone's Been Reading My Diary
Does my "Scottish" show too much if I confess that this sounds so incredibly delicious to me?
Title: FRENCH FRY SPAM CASSEROLE
Categories: Main dish
Yield: 8 servings
1 pk Frozen french fry potatoes,
-thawed (20 oz)
2 c Shredded Cheddar cheese
2 c Sour cream
1 cn Condensed cream of chicken
-soup (10 3/4 oz)
1 cn SPAM Luncheon Meat, cubed
-(12 oz)
1/2 c Chopped red bell pepper
1/2 c Chopped green onion
1/2 c Finely crushed corn flakes
Heat oven to 350'F. In large bowl, combine potatoes, cheese, sour
cream, and soup. Stir in SPAM, bell pepper, and green onion. Spoon
into 13x9" baking dish. Sprinkle with crushed flakes. Bake 30-40
minutes or until thoroughly heated.
Title: FRENCH FRY SPAM CASSEROLE
Categories: Main dish
Yield: 8 servings
1 pk Frozen french fry potatoes,
-thawed (20 oz)
2 c Shredded Cheddar cheese
2 c Sour cream
1 cn Condensed cream of chicken
-soup (10 3/4 oz)
1 cn SPAM Luncheon Meat, cubed
-(12 oz)
1/2 c Chopped red bell pepper
1/2 c Chopped green onion
1/2 c Finely crushed corn flakes
Heat oven to 350'F. In large bowl, combine potatoes, cheese, sour
cream, and soup. Stir in SPAM, bell pepper, and green onion. Spoon
into 13x9" baking dish. Sprinkle with crushed flakes. Bake 30-40
minutes or until thoroughly heated.
Saturday, January 28, 2006
Happy Chinese New Year!
It's New Year's Eve, y'all!!
You know how we Scots love our new year's eves. So I'm beyond thrilled that I now have THREE of them! Hogmanay (New Years Eve), Rosh Hashanah, and now the lunar new year. And, praise be, The Bambina is apparently as delighted by the whole thing as her mother.
To celebrate the new year we went to a Families With Children from China event at a local Chinese restaurant.
Y'all. Five hundred people. Two hundred plus little Chinese-American kids in there. It was awesome. The Bambina rocked the house.
In general, The Bambina is a very outgoing, happy-go-lucky kid. She says hi and blows kisses to random people and loves singing and dancing (especially to her new favorite songs: Lollipop [that 50's tune: lollipop lollipop oooh lolli lollipop] and The Name Game [Mama Mama Momamma bananafanna fofamma fee fi momamma]. The one thing that seems to dull her joy is Kiddie Chaos. Rooms full of screaming, running kids send her into my arms, kill the singing, create massive separation anxiety, and most decidedly stop the generally nonstop Soul Train-worthy dancing. So it was with a wee bit of internal trepidation that we went to today's event, but I figured the only way to get her used to it is to expose her to it. So off we went.
What can I say? She had the most fun I've seen her have in months. She became one of those kids running around, making noise, dancing, singing, climbing on the stage while the Chinese dance performers were up there, and just generally acted like a debutante (A la Diana Ross: I'm comin' out! I want the world to know! Got to let it show!). It was so hot on the dance floor and her wee face was getting all pink, I was getting seriously schvitzy, and I could tell she was roasting in her hot pink silk Chinese outfit. I was secretly hoping we could go sit down soon, but whenever the music stopped she shoved her hand in the air, one finger pointing upward, and shouted, "MOH!" (more!) I seriously thought I'd cry as I watched her have the time of her wee life.
It's been that kind of "Mommy Happy Crying" week. She turned 20 months old. She got a "big girl bed" to replace her crib. She now has a little kiddie table and chairs, so her high chair is gone too. And she decided today that she was a big girl who could eat with her own chopsticks (although the restaurant rug under her chair tells the real story!), that she wanted to drink from a glass rather than her sippy cup, and that she was going to dance on the stage whether I was coming with her or not.
I can't believe how grown up she is, and I can't believe how it has happened so fast and so imperceptibly right under my nose. One minute I'm responsible for every single need she has, and then all of a sudden--BAM--she sleeps in a bed, puts on her own clothes, poops in the potty...and turns into a Dancin' Machine just in time for the new year.
Something tells me it's gonna be a good one.
You know how we Scots love our new year's eves. So I'm beyond thrilled that I now have THREE of them! Hogmanay (New Years Eve), Rosh Hashanah, and now the lunar new year. And, praise be, The Bambina is apparently as delighted by the whole thing as her mother.
To celebrate the new year we went to a Families With Children from China event at a local Chinese restaurant.
Y'all. Five hundred people. Two hundred plus little Chinese-American kids in there. It was awesome. The Bambina rocked the house.
In general, The Bambina is a very outgoing, happy-go-lucky kid. She says hi and blows kisses to random people and loves singing and dancing (especially to her new favorite songs: Lollipop [that 50's tune: lollipop lollipop oooh lolli lollipop] and The Name Game [Mama Mama Momamma bananafanna fofamma fee fi momamma]. The one thing that seems to dull her joy is Kiddie Chaos. Rooms full of screaming, running kids send her into my arms, kill the singing, create massive separation anxiety, and most decidedly stop the generally nonstop Soul Train-worthy dancing. So it was with a wee bit of internal trepidation that we went to today's event, but I figured the only way to get her used to it is to expose her to it. So off we went.
What can I say? She had the most fun I've seen her have in months. She became one of those kids running around, making noise, dancing, singing, climbing on the stage while the Chinese dance performers were up there, and just generally acted like a debutante (A la Diana Ross: I'm comin' out! I want the world to know! Got to let it show!). It was so hot on the dance floor and her wee face was getting all pink, I was getting seriously schvitzy, and I could tell she was roasting in her hot pink silk Chinese outfit. I was secretly hoping we could go sit down soon, but whenever the music stopped she shoved her hand in the air, one finger pointing upward, and shouted, "MOH!" (more!) I seriously thought I'd cry as I watched her have the time of her wee life.
It's been that kind of "Mommy Happy Crying" week. She turned 20 months old. She got a "big girl bed" to replace her crib. She now has a little kiddie table and chairs, so her high chair is gone too. And she decided today that she was a big girl who could eat with her own chopsticks (although the restaurant rug under her chair tells the real story!), that she wanted to drink from a glass rather than her sippy cup, and that she was going to dance on the stage whether I was coming with her or not.
I can't believe how grown up she is, and I can't believe how it has happened so fast and so imperceptibly right under my nose. One minute I'm responsible for every single need she has, and then all of a sudden--BAM--she sleeps in a bed, puts on her own clothes, poops in the potty...and turns into a Dancin' Machine just in time for the new year.
Something tells me it's gonna be a good one.
Don't F with The O
James Frey, you big fat moron.
Forget about literary dissembling.
Forget about pretending you are someone you're not.
Forget about turning the publishing industry on its ear about memoir verification.
Forget about betraying all those readers who bought your book and truly connected with your pain.
Dude. You F'd with Oprah.
Dick Cheney himself could put the electrodes on my genitals and I still would not talk. But you tell me I'm going on national television with Oprah? You'll get the Truth. And nuthin' but, baby.
Because YOU DO *NOT* F WITH THE O.
Forget about literary dissembling.
Forget about pretending you are someone you're not.
Forget about turning the publishing industry on its ear about memoir verification.
Forget about betraying all those readers who bought your book and truly connected with your pain.
Dude. You F'd with Oprah.
Dick Cheney himself could put the electrodes on my genitals and I still would not talk. But you tell me I'm going on national television with Oprah? You'll get the Truth. And nuthin' but, baby.
Because YOU DO *NOT* F WITH THE O.
Thursday, January 26, 2006
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
I Agree With The Pope
WTF?!!
Yeah. I can't believe I am actually saying these words. I think Pope Benedict's encyclical on love and sex is potentially something I could agree with.
Look above you. Pigs are flying. But hey, as Dean Martin crooned happily, "Ain't that a kick in the head?!"
The Pope
Yeah. I can't believe I am actually saying these words. I think Pope Benedict's encyclical on love and sex is potentially something I could agree with.
Look above you. Pigs are flying. But hey, as Dean Martin crooned happily, "Ain't that a kick in the head?!"
The Pope
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