Barfing and Blogging Do NOT Mix

Pardon my recent absence from blogging. As the law of unintended consequences clearly states:

A) When you put your daughter into day care with other little adorable microbial carriers, you will end up with a violent three-day foray into the world of stomach viruses. She of course will be perfectly healthy, you however will be sicker than you can ever remember being.

B) When you tell people you want to "lose a few pounds" and begin a diet to do just that, said stomach virus will make you question the value of losing a few pounds--and the means by which it might happen.

C) When you tell yourself that you will blog about being sick in order to make the best out of a bad situation, you soon realize that you can't even move your arms to dial the phone, much less put a thought together and type it out, thereby being too sick to blog about being sick.

TMI (Too Much Information) section:
Today is Day Three and I am finally able to eat a popsicle and drink tea. For the past two days, anything I have put in my mouth has come right back up within 10 minutes. My mom was all over the phone beseeching me to stay hydrated, but it just was not happening sans vomit, so I gave up trying. From there, things started to "go south" and I can only say the following however indelicately: you haven't lived until you've sprinted to the bathroom (but not fast enough) and crapped your pants at the age of thirty-something. There are few things more depressing than that. Except of course, making it to the commode and having to vomit simultaneously...

So, as disgusting as this return to the blog may be, it's still a return. Here's to a vomit-free day! Woo Hoo!!!