Wednesday, March 19, 2008

I'm Dreading Weds.

Tomorrow is Wednesday, the day before (as I've mentioned) my colonoscopy. Major thanks and love to everyone who has sent wishes for duodenal and ileal harmony. I'm still dreading tomorrow (later today?) for the simple reason that I am experiencing massive bowel cleansing already, as a result of whatever it is that I need to do the bowel cleansing to identify. So even though I won't start the "Prep" till the afternoon, I am not allowed to take immodium as of tonight. If Monday AM and this AM were any indication, it will therefore result in an average rate of two adverse commodal events every 60 minutes--before I even start the prep in the afternoon.

I recognize that this what an old family friend would call "not Shabbos table" discussion material. But where else but her (three or four) loyal readers can a girl turn to when her colon has suddenly turned into an exclamation?

I'll see if I can post tomorrow, but if not, rest assured that I'll be back at ya on Friday with the post-colonic latest. Turd. I mean, Word.

5 comments:

Vigilante said...

Thinking thoughts.

Ken said...

Good luck.

And this post has the greatest series of brilliant wordsmithing about pooping that I've ever seen.

Out of respect, I will refrain from linking to it with my planned title of "Haggis to take it in the ass!"

Anonymous said...

Best of luck E. (and the rest of the household...)

Ken, I think a better link might be:
"Haggis to blow it out her ass!"

Vigilante said...

I'm not coming back in here until Saturday. It'll take all of you that much time to clean this room up. (And people call me crude?) Jeezelouise!

Anonymous said...

When you see the full colonoscope you'll never view The Matrix in quite the same way.

Good luck!