Facebook Friends

So I ended up on Facebook. I don't recall how exactly. I think someone wondered why I wasn't on it, so I said okay. Then I ignored it for probably a year or so. Then someone "friended" me and I thought I'd better check it out to make sure I wasn't divulging too much information or whatever. I think I was thinking it was like MySpace. You know, full of tweens leaving cruel messages for each other, pretending to be Zac Efron totally dumping your ass. I was stunned to see perfectly normal (except perhaps for their friendship with me), seemingly non-criminal people on it. The chaplain of my old college is on it--and so is the rabbi! So I figured I'd give it a go, seeing as it's (cue the violin music) the only real way I'll see any of my friends' faces these days. I was also pleasantly surprised to see that no one in my networks was disparaging anyone's male virility or female chastity in crude, misspelled diatribes. So there I am.

The parts I'm enjoying most are the updates on what people are doing (again, for the shut-in loser in me) and the Bookshelf application. You can post on your profile all the books you've read, the ones you want to read, etc, which I am loving as a way to get book recos from friends. So all in all, my facebook experience has been going rather well. I still can't bring myself to put my kid's face or name on there, nor do I want to really really identify myself for people who only know me in an ancillary way. But I'm liking the level of involvement I have right now.

Contrast with the BabyDaddy. Beyond the fact that I should call him HWNDNBMITB (He Whose Name Dare Not Be Mentioned In The Blog) instead of BBDD, he is adamant that he will not under any circumstances join facebook. So tonight I was telling him how his friends in real life are now my facebook friends. (I mean, they are my friends too obviously (even if I'm closer to their wives), but you know what I mean; I know them because I know him). He is still unmoved. I showed him that his professional colleagues are on facebook and are no less credible for it; still he is unmoved. I've gotta respect his love of privacy, but I find it humorous nonetheless. So I started going through my (his) friend list near him and saying things tenderly like, "Oh Andrew. I'm so glad you're my friend." "Oh Julian, I can't tell you how happy it makes me to be your facebook friend..." "Oh Todd, when I need someone to chat with, to share my feelings with, I'll just SuperPoke you! Because you're my facebook friend!" Amazingly, he still will not join facebook, not even to stop me SuperPoking his friends. ;) But me, I think I like it. I think it works for me because everyone on my friend list is actually a person I know decently well and like. I see people with, like, 455 friends and I'm wondering if they actually really know every one of them to the extent that that person would want a note popping up saying, "E just had OJ for breakfast!"

My only complaint is that the fun quizzes available sometimes inadvertently spam your friends if you're not precise with the mouse clickage. I think I sent all my friends (including former professors and political pundits--and rabbis and chaplains) the following message: "E just took the 'Name That Smokin' Hot Actress' Quiz and she wants to challenge you to a match! Can you beat E's 89% score?" I also don't like how it always alerts everyone to everything you've done. Being a newbie I wrote a friend what I thought was a note. Turns out I put it on her "wall," so my profile immediately read, "E just wrote M a note. Click here to read it." Whaaaa?!! Thank God it was an innocuous whassup, rather than something like a tenderly-worded "I'm so glad you're my hunka hunka burnin facebook friend." Because THAT would be an invasion of my closely-guarded privacy. ;)